Back into the wild.
Why some ideas need their perfect moment.
The Tiger.
He destroyed his cage.
Yes YES
The tiger is out.
~ “The Tiger” by Nael, Age 6
Important: I’ve changed the name of my Substack. To make sure you don’t miss out, add this email address to your contact lists: ageofunknowing@substack.com
Thanks!
Seven years ago, I made what felt like the smartest decision of my writing life. I optioned the film rights to my screenplay and novel, “I Am Keats.”
This is the kind of story that lives and dies by its secrets—every twist, every reveal, every carefully planted clue designed to unfold at exactly the right moment. To know it beforehand is to break the spell. I could not let even a whisper escape while Hollywood worked its magic, so I pulled it from circulation entirely.
Then life happened. A pandemic that rewrote everything. Industry players who transformed overnight. Cultural shifts that changed the entire landscape. The movie that was supposed to be never came to be.
But some ideas refuse to stay buried.
Now, with all agreements expired, I’m releasing this story back into the wild where it belongs—reborn, refined, and more vital than ever. My inner voice has been insistent, telling me this needs to be out there, especially now with all the uncertainty, confusion, and tension surrounding how we’re supposed to live, how we’re supposed to be.
So here it is—the story you were meant to experience at this particular time.
THE BEAUTIFUL UNKNOWING
A life-changing accident.
An artful intervention.
An uncontrollable transformation.Life isn’t a story you write. It’s a song only you can hear.
When someone’s carefully orchestrated world suddenly spins beyond control, what happens when the only choice left is to stop fighting the chaos and start listening to it? “The Beautiful Unknowing” follows a journey through the wreckage of best-laid plans, where attempting to rewrite reality leads to discovering something far more profound than success or failure—the raw, unscripted beauty of simply being human.
This is a big-hearted, emotional gut-check about the clarifying chaos of letting go, the courage to feel instead of control, and the wild freedom that comes from recognizing there are no answers to get wrong—only the mysterious dance of being fully alive.
For everyone who’s ever tried to script their way to happiness, this is a story rich in humor, heart, and insight during uncertain times.
But here’s the bonus: while “The Beautiful Unknowing” will challenge your assumptions and maybe even change how you see your life, it does so with the kind of story that makes you forget you’re reading anything “important” at all.
Whether you typically reach for business books or romance novels, whether you love memoirs or avoid anything that might make you think too hard—this story meets you where you are and takes you somewhere you didn’t know you needed to go. It’s my truth, offered in service of awakening yours.
Here’s what one reader, who was impacted in a way that rarely happens, had to say:
“It’s been years since a book took me on a roller-coaster ride of emotions. I laughed until I cried during parts of this book and wiped away tears of sadness during others. I predict that you’ll take this book to your heart. And you’ll probably never forget it.”
Author’s Note
I’ve grown tired of the spiritual cliché that tells us we must sleepwalk through the first half of our lives—building egos, chasing external validation, conforming to society’s expectations—before we can “wake up” and live consciously, with presence and aliveness.
What cruel logic suggests that our most energetic, wild, physically vibrant and creative years should be sacrificed to cultural hypnosis? Why should we wait for a midlife crisis or personal tragedy to jolt us into awareness? This narrative doesn’t just rob us of decades of potential aliveness—it excuses unconsciousness as somehow necessary, even noble.
We’ve been sold on the idea that we need to earn our awakening through years of sleepwalking. But what if consciousness isn’t something we graduate into after paying our dues to convention, but something available to us right now—at twenty, at thirty, at any moment we choose to truly see?
This book argues for immediate rebellion against this timeline. It’s a big-hearted, offbeat manifesto for those who refuse to postpone their aliveness, who won’t accept that consciousness and clarity are consolation prizes for getting older.
This is about waking up now, living and loving fully in this moment, and refusing to wait for permission to be fully alive. If that sounds like what you’ve been looking for, you’re in the right place.
This book was originally published in 2017 as “I Am Keats: The Art of Inciting Chaos”—the same year I released a nonfiction book with the same title but a different subtitle. Two books, one title, different subtitles.
Following my inner voice sometimes creates confusion, and that creative disorder informs every page of what you’re about to read. But while I’m comfortable with existential unknowing, I draw the line at confusing readers over something as basic as a book title.
So here we are: “The Beautiful Unknowing.” Same story, some updates, clearer intentions. If you bought the original, don’t buy this expecting something entirely new. You’ll find the same uncompromising story you already know.
If you’re new to this work, you’re about to enter something that will demand your attention, your willingness to be uncomfortable, and your capacity to sit with questions that don’t have clean answers. It will ask for that old literary bargain: the willing suspension of disbelief. But not in the way you might expect.
Seven years this story sat silent while the world spun through chaos, while we all learned what it means to have our carefully laid plans shattered overnight. Maybe that timing wasn’t coincidence. Maybe this story needed to emerge now, when we’re all a little more familiar with uncertainty, a little more ready to question the scripts we’ve been handed.
If you’ve ever felt the quiet desperation of living someone else’s version of your life, if you’ve caught yourself going through the motions while your soul screams for something real—this story is your wake-up call.
Don’t wait for a crisis to choose consciousness. Don’t postpone your aliveness for a more convenient season. Your real life is waiting. Get “The Beautiful Unknowing” and start living fully today.
Stay passionate!
